How can I understand celibacy?  
Is it a the condition of not being married?  Yes, celibacy in general is not marrying, for the celibate person does not get married.  However, that is not all. 

A bachelor does not get married either, but there is a great and basic difference between the bachelor and the celibate. 

Let us review the words of our   Lord Jesus Christ,   to   Him be glory, when he taught about celibacy after he had discussed marriage and divorce. "His disciples said to him: 'If such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry.' But He said to them, 'All cannot accept this saying, but only those to whom it has been given.  For there are eunuchs who were born thus from their mother's womb, and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves  eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake.  he who is able to accept it, let him accept it!'" (Mt. 18: 10 - 12). 

Thus, the celibate person is the one who made himself a eunuch for the kingdom of heaven's sake. 

Can everyone accept these words?
Our Lord Jesus Christ, to Him be glory, said: "but only those to whom it has been given..... He who  is able   to  accept it,  let  him accept it."

We wonder why He did not say this when He taught about prayer, or charity, or fasting, or when He completed the law of the Old Testament.    The   answer  is    clear; everyone has to accept these virtues and pursue them as they are necessary and useful for their salvation.  But as for those who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven, not everyone is able to do it, but only those to whom it is given.

Celibacy is a Gift of God
 Those who think that it is merely a struggle on the part of the individual are wrong, no matter how holy that struggle is.  Otherwise our Lord would not have said: "but only to whom it has been given ....  and he who is able to accept it, let him accept it."

Therefore, it is a gift granted by God to individuals whose hearts He has examined, whose ardent love that pervades their life He knows.

They have made eunuchs of themselves for the sake of the kingdom of heaven.  This reveals the extent and greatness of their surpassing love.

The celibate offers his life as a holy sacrifice, a sacrifice of love, on the altar of  celibacy.   It is  true   that everybody is invited to the kingdom, and everyone longs for the kingdom, and all are members in the body of Christ, but the soul of the celibate is a special bride of Christ's.

The soul of the celibate has gone out after its Lord and is attached to Him.  It lays all its life wholly in the hands of its Lord, and so Jesus Christ becomes its groom.

The Real Bridegroom of the Soul
 Celibacy, as well as being a gift granted by God, is also a holy marriage, a strong and holy bond with Christ Who sanctifies all the bonds of marriage.

This holy  marriage is  totally confirmed, first of all, by the element of love which gives determination and purpose.  It is this love that gives all future striving meaning and value; it grants to those to whom it is given a pure will that does not rebel. It gives them a strong faith and great boldness that make them turn their back on the whole world with all its pleasures to desire Christ and to be enlightened by His love.

The celibate,   who  has fixed his eyes, his emotions, and his will as a special bride on the Beloved, devotes his life for the sake of Christ Himself.  He does not consecrate it to any work or service however great, but, as  the Lord says, for the sake of the kingdom of heaven.

This holy objective gives the service of the consecrated celibate the power of witnessing.  St. Paul the Apostle was a celibate and served and ministered as the greatest minister in Christianity. Fiery Elijah, who was celibate, carried out the greatest of tasks; the secret of his power was that he fixed  his eyes  on  the God of  his holy fathers and was jealous with the jealousy of the Lord.

The soul of the celibate, which has become the bride of Christ, can confirm and witness to the surpassing beauty of Christ.  It abandons everything to follow Him; its thought is free of all sense of the world.  It separates itself from the world to unite with the Only One; it abandons many to unite with the One Who is fairer than the sons of men.

How  beautiful are the words of one of the celibates:

• O sweet and greatly beloved Jesus, grant that I may rest in You.
• Above every creature
• Above every health and beauty
• Above every glory and honor
• Above every wealth and prosperity
• Above every knowledge and intelligence
• Above every fortune and art
• Above every happiness and joy
• Above every sweetness and comfort
• Above every promise and hope
• Above every deserving and desire
• Above all You give as gifts and talents
• Above every happiness and joy; for my heart cannot really rest or walk well unless it rests in You, rising above every gift and every creation.
• Lord Jesus Christ, my greatly beloved bridegroom, O great and pure love, the Master of all creation, grant me the wings of real freedom so that I might fly and rest in You.
• Let others  ask fo r whatever seems good to them other than You, but as for me, nothing is or will be good to me except You alone.
• You are my God, my hope, my eternal salvation.
•  Celibacy is a gift, a holy marriage, and a bond of pure love; in it, the celibate soul sings a hymn of praise saying: "I am my beloved's; and my beloved is mine."(Song6:3).

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