y22

Coptic Orthodox Patriarchate
Bishopric of Youth Bookstore

TOWARD A SOUND VIEW OF SEX
Number 22

Archdeacon Ramsis Naguib

Towards a Sound View of Sex
You desire truth! When the conversation is about sex, or a book discusses sexual matters, you listen most carefully and are keen to read it. This is not wrong and you are not a curious youth because this subject preoccupies you or because you are eager to know more about it. Be reassured; you are a youth who is searching for the truth and who desires life.

My dear young person,

I hope you are not one of those people who understand chastity to consist of despising sex and everything related to it, just as I hope you will not be upset when you read the following words.

Chastity and purity are not found in those who despise sexual matters or in those who assume a spurious modest. Sex of itself is a noble thing and is something holy that God has created in us to His glory.

The Truly Pure Youth
He is the one who appreciates that sex and the sexual function have a great and immortal role.

The Truly Chaste Youth
He is the one who really knows how to behave in his sexual life. He appreciates the sexual function and puts it in its rightful place. He possesses both spiritual and scientific knowledge that is far removed from the immodesty of honeyed words. This is what we have decided to talk to you about. You desire the truth for your own good, so it is your right to learn the truth.

It is better that we convey the truth to you than that you should get it from erroneous sources that could ruin you life. Who knows? This wrong information could lead you to stray to a point where you would be far from leading a spiritual life and far from God.

My dear Youth,
There has been a lot of talk about instincts: their kinds, their number, and their roles. No matter what is said about the instincts, and no matter how greatly researchers and scientists may differ, the modern world cannot deny that both man and animals possess the following instincts:

1. The instinct to look for food.
2. The sexual instinct.

The reason is clear, for each of them has basic and physiological effects in the bodies of both animals and humans.
+ The instinct to look for food has for purpose the sustenance of life and functions through the digestive system.
+ The sexual instinct has for purpose the preservation of the species, both the individual of the species and   the species   itself   and functions through the reproductive system.
After this explanation, which is within the domain of science, we will discuss a view that can only be described as strange and dangerous towards the instincts in general and the sexual function in particular. This view is promoted by the materialism and the spirit of the age which strongly pervade the lives of young people so that they desire pleasure and pursue lust even if this is at the expense of spiritual values. This could also be at their personal expense!
Man, according to this view, is composed of body and soul.
+ The body is wholly separated from the soul and is ruled and controlled by the instincts.
+ The soul has its own needs and its own food.
Man has to fulfill the demands of the body, and descend to the level of satisfying his instincts, even if they do represent the animal part of man.   Man can do   nothing other than this. As long as anything is   dictated by the    instincts,    it is considered natural..
The young man thus satisfies his lusts and gives in to their demands without any controls since his instincts require it! The sexual function, to him, is merely an animal function that man must satisfy and go along with no matter what the cost and what the price. This is what this erroneous attitude consists of!
My young brother,
This is an insidious principle that makes its way into your mind, and a false attitude that has no sound basis. Religion rejects it and science despises it; the honor of the young person refuses to submit to it.
There is nothing animal of the sort in the human being, and the sexual function is not animal in nature as this attitude would indicate. It is inaccurate and grievously wrong to say that the instincts in man   are totally similar to their counterparts in animals. In man, they are instincts that deserve to be called "human."
The Purpose of the Sexual Instincts
The highest    purpose of the sexual instinct is found in the sacrament of marriage. The function of the sexual instinct is as noble and glorious as this sacrament is great. The Church honors this sacrament and Christ blessed it when He attended the wedding at Cana of Galilee.     The greatest   minister in Christianity, that is, St. Paul the Apostle also discusses it. (Heb. 13:4). He elevates the unity of man and woman and gives us a pure image of it when he compares it to the unity of Christ with the church: "Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and he is the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything." (Eph. 5: 22 -24).
Then he addresses the men saying: "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for it that He might sanctify it .... So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes it and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. For we are members of His body, of His flesh, and of His bones. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." (Eph. 15:26 -31).
It is the Holy Spirit Who works in the sacrament. It is the Holy Spirit Who changes the bread and wine into flesh and blood. The Holy Spirit descends on the water in the baptismal font so that man is born anew.
It   is   the Holy Spirit   Who sanctifies the marriage bond so that it becomes a spiritual bond. That is why   St. Paul    the Apostle    says: "Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled" (Heb. 13: 4). It is the Holy Spirit Who blesses and sanctifies this bond; therefore, what God has joined let no man separate.
END

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